High strung mom asks tutor to teach her 3-year-old son math for 4 hours a week: 'How long does it usually take for him to get better?'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Aug 2, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

Kids need the opportunity just to be kids without the pressures of academic achievement. If a toddler shows interest in reading, that's an excellent opportunity to expand their world through literacy. But if a 3-year-old can't read yet and doesn't seem particularly ready/interested in reading, that doesn't mean you have to hire a team of educational experts to diagnose what's wrong with your kid. There's nothing wrong with a toddler who isn't interested in subjects that are more appropriate for a six or seven-year-old. If your kid is eight and still can't read, that's cause for concern, but there's a whole lot of learning that happens from age 3 to age 8. Kids can learn to read faster than you'd think. Rushing them into academic subjects that aren't developmentally appropriate can lead to resentment towards school in the future, which isn't ideal. If your 3-year-old can say his times tables, that's great, but that's the exception, not the rule. 

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  • The mom in this story might have some unrealistic expectations of where her toddler son should be academically. She wants to hire a tutor to teach him for an hour a day, 3-4 times a week, which is lowkey ridiculous for a preschooler. 

  • Is it normal for a three year old to need math help?

    6:50 151 Hello iMessage Today 3:46 PM 53 I'm seeking a tutor for my son Are you available? Yes I am! How old is he and what subjects does he need tutored? Mathematics He is 3 years old Today 5:23 PM Oh it's lovely to get a head start! I've never worked with kids that young, but I'd be happy to do some reading and we could see how it works on a trial basis? Yes that's okay with me How much do you charge? + I charge $25/hr but can do 30 minute sessions as well. I'm free during the daytime everyday
    via u/toastedwitch
  • 6:50 151 53 I charge $25/hr but can do 30 minute sessions as well. I'm free during the daytime everyday until August 18, then it will be afternoons M-Th and Days Fri-Sat. How many hours can you do a day? Generally I only do an hour a day for anyone younger than high school, since focus is stronger over shorter periods of time. For anyone younger than five I would recommend 30 minute sessions so it's more manageable for them I would like to do one hour for now Okay, how often would you like to ha
    via u/toastedwitch
  • 6:50 151 3-4 times weekly 4pm How long does it usually take for all the lessons before he get better? 53 Honestly, every child is different and it's hard to say how toddlers will retain information. Is there a goal you have in mind for them? Nothing for now + Message Delivered The I'm =A QWE R T Y U OP A 123 S D F G HJ K L ZXCV B NM :D space ☑ return
    via u/toastedwitch
  • NAparentheses This sounds like a scam. They will probably try to send you payment for a huge chunk then say they sent you too much and try to get you to send the extra back.
    via u/NAparentheses
  • toastedwitch OP I was thinking it could potentially be trying to lure me somewhere, but this makes sense also!
    via u/toastedwitch
  • rasputin1 why would you use a totally unrealistic situation for a scam then?? might as well have said they were like 12 or something more believable
    via u/rasputin1
  • Technical-Prize-4840 I have a 3 year old niece, she still talks mostly in gibberish with a few real words sprinkled in. Although she also seems to have a wild imagination and I'm not entirely confident she isn't in Wonderland in her head 99% of the time. She knows colors, some letters, and can count to around 10. She is pretty standard for her age from what I can tell.
    via u/Technical-Prize-4840
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    via Senjuti Kundu

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Anyways, I cannot imagine a 3 year old sitting in one place for more than 15 min, let alone focusing for that long. An hour 4 times a week is widely unrealistic. These kids should be learning from play, spontaneously. Education at that age is interacting with the child. Working on colors, letters, and numbers while playing. They are still learning how to be a human, they aren't ready for rigid educational standards yet.
    via u/Technical-Prize-4840
  • Cheezburger Image 10537405952
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • I'd tell this parent that after some consideration you do not feel qualified to tutor a child that young. Recommend that the parent look for an early childhood education expert.
    via u/Technical-Prize-4840
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    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.
     

  • toastedwitch OP This is exactly what I was thinking, thank you. And also, I'm definitely using your reply, makes me feel more secure.
    via u/toastedwitch
  • princesspripri Doesn't sound right at all. I would avoid this. At that age the "maths" involves, counting, shapes, sizes, games etc. I have an advanced 4yr old niece, I still wouldn't skip these basics with her, no matter how advanced.
    via u/princesspripri
  • Plus 30 mins is the max we'll get out of kids that age. Even then 30 mins on one topic isn't going to last the whole 30 mins. It would most likely be a combination of 15 mins phonics and 15 mins "maths". 1 hour is way too much time! Way too ambitious!
    via u/princesspripri
  • Then 3-4 times weekly is also too much for 1 hour each day! A more appropriate time is 30 mins lesson including both phonics and maths twice weekly to start. A child that young also needs to adapt to a new tutor, which takes time. Confidence with a new tutor needs building up.
    via u/princesspripri
  • The “parent” asks you first how many hours can you do, instead of telling you they can only do one hour a day. It's only after you will charge 1 hour they accept. How many hours were they going to ask you to tutor a 3 year old in one day?
    via u/princesspripri
  • Then the final red flag is that they don't have any goals. Why seek a tutor if there are no goals? I don't know what their intention is here but it doesn't seem like they genuinely need a tutor for a 3yr old.
    via u/princesspripri
  • toastedwitch OP Thank you for this. You gave me real reasons I felt off about it. I often feel like I'm overreacting, but I'm starting to wonder if this person even has a child or if this is a ploy to get a young woman somewhere under this pretext
    via u/toastedwitch
  • princesspripri I hope to God it's not that sinister. But I agree with you, your instincts are right about this one. I don't trust it at all. They haven't used the right age, or the right subject, the right length of time, or frequency. It's like they don't even know a 3 year old. A great lesson in trusting our instincts, even when we can't quite put our finger on it! I'm glad you asked for second opinions
    via u/princesspripri
  • Oranginafina I once tutored a 3 year old in math. It was during Co_id and I was working for an enrichment center that moved operations online. We mostly just did counting and simple addition. One of his parents always sat with him. His mom spoke English and Chinese and his dad spoke English and Italian. The kid was trilingual and knew all the numbers in all three languages. I definitely think they were helicopter parents that were pushing him to be a baby genius.
    via u/Oranginafina
  • skanderkeg It doesn't sound like a scam to me honestly but I would probably avoid a parent who wants to get a personal tutor for a 3 year old.
    via u/skanderkeg
  • toastedwitch OP Yeah I'm with you on that. Even if it's legit, it's just odd
    via u/toastedwitch
  • somanyquestions32 They likely want a glorified babysitter to do math games and teach some math basics. I would pass as I prefer to work with older students.
    via u/somanyquestions32
  • Electrical-Fig-3206 Your prices are too low
    via u/Electrical-Fig-3206
  • toastedwitch OP I'm having trouble finding any students right now and I don't want potential students to walk away because I'm too expensive. I'd rather have less money than no money
    via u/toastedwitch

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